Get The Happiness Habit

In my Emotional Balance e-book I tell you “this is where you start to release and receive.”

I tell you this from first hand experience. There are a lot of weeds tied up in my emotional soil. Small ones and big ones.  The final step in healing from them is releasing them.

While memories fade, our body doesn’t forget.

I’ll give you an example of what I mean by this…

I was made to feel incredibly ashamed, small and embarrassed at a family occasion once when I began to discuss my ideas around finding childcare so that I could go back to work part time. At the time I was feeling incredibly guilty and sad about having to go back to work at all. It was only for financial reasons. The response I got was like a stab in the stomach. My guts physically twisted and I thought I was going to be sick. My body burned with embarrassment and shame and I had to take myself off to the toilet to recompose.

Now, when I think about asking for help from anyone regarding the girls I start to feel these same physical sensations. That tiny ripple in time has left a significant physiological imprint in my body. The similar sensations I start to feel now as I begin to consider asking for help are my body remembering. And the thing is, needing help with my girls is inevitable, so these sensations aren’t helpful. I am a working mum with one very high needs child and her sister and the consequence of not asking for help is leaving me exhausted.

So how does one release the painful memories stored in their body?

I am addressing this in a blog because I am doing some really deep work on me at the moment. I have realised that a combination of the constant multitasking of motherhood and battle to keep bad memories in their box, with the lid shut tight where they can’t hurt me, has made me forget how to really live in the moment. In this way I have been working on meditation and consciously immersing myself fully in the moment I am in. This has included creating space to enter each moment in a peaceful, relaxed state of mind and honoring myself the space afterwards to appreciate what I have immersed myself in, even if only briefly before I move on to the next thing.

My goal is to be in a more peaceful state of being in 30 days time. I believe my self confidence is being blocked by this lack of peace and only by releasing the unhappiness of the past can I receive the happiness of my future. There are many intentions for my life that are living on Someday Island at the moment!

Last year I designed a life I truly believed would bring me happiness every day, but my emotional issues are preventing me from living it to its potential. It is time for change.

They say it takes 30 days to develop a new habit. Are you ready to develop the Happiness Habit with me?

I have done some extensive research and come up with my own plan to make that change and become the peaceful, confident person I want to be.

My essential oils have been an integral part of getting me to this point, which is what I teach you in the e-book, Emotional Balance. If you haven’t read it already I really recommend it to make a workable plan to lead a more balanced life, emotionally. We identify your triggers for emotional imbalance and the feelings that aren’t productive in your life and make a plan to manage them. Getting into a place where emotions do not obstruct you from being the person you want to be is just one part of designing a life that brings you happiness and fulfillment every day.

My own plan with the essential oils has brought me to the point I have reached now: ready and feeling able to release the emotional burden I have carried for too long. In essence, they have reconnected me to my heart.

“Essential oils raise the vibration of the physical body (Stewart, 2003.) As the body lives in higher vibrations, lower energies (such as supposed emotions) become unbearable. They want to release. Stagnant anger, sadness, grief, judgement and low self-worth cannot exist in the environment of balance and peace which essential oils help to create. Emotional healing occurs as old feelings surface and release (Morton, 1992). Sometimes this experience is confused with regression. People may perceive they are going backwards, or that the essential oils aren’t working. We are so used to symptomatic healing that we have been conditioned to view healing as the immediate cessation of all physical and emotional pain. In reality, the oils are working.” Daniel McDonald, Emotional Healing with Essential Oils.

Are you ready to develop the Happiness Habit with me? If any of what I have written resonates with you, The Happiness Habit might be of interest to you to support you on a journey to a place where your emotions remain calm and balanced.

You will get:

  • Mindfulness ideas
  • Self care ideas
  • Motivating Quotes
  • And more!

Giving yourself the permission to feel is a first step…

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The other day I cried. Like I cried buckets. I cried at Coffee Group, then I cried at the gym after sparring, then I cried all the way home. I couldn’t really explain it at the time, but the next day I felt better; lighter.

I realised that unknowingly this healing process had begun and the feelings and emotions that are part of it are uncomfortable. #beingmum to Eden has been uncomfortable and I realised that it is because of the incredibly traumatic experience we had in that first year with her, when she was at her worst. She would cry inconsolably and often physically push me away.

When you are mum it is your job to have all the answers, or you feel it is. It is certainly your job to soothe your crying baby. I would try and hold her in my arms and love her pain away. She would just bring up her knees and arch her back, pushing me away. I felt hopeless. I felt like a crap mother because I couldn’t soothe her. I felt empty of solutions to help her and exhausted by her constant cries.

Now, I have noticed that I get the same physical sensations when I run out of ideas to “reach” her. I go into this default feeling of hopeless rather than empowered. I have got on top of the physical symptoms of Eden’s condition with the oils now, just about, but we are still learning our way through the emotional stuff and in a similar way to when she was a baby when she is emotionally uncomfortable she pushes me away and my emotional response is inappropriate and rooted in the past. And it’s uncomfortable.

It is time to release. I am ready to release and receive the the joys and fulfilment of ALL of the life I designed for myself a year ago.

Are you ready to develop the Happiness Habit with me?  Click here and select “Join The Happiness Habit” from the dropdown box.  It’s completely free and I will see you there!

Much love,

Clare

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The Value of Consistent Use of Essential Oils

Whether you are using essential oils to treat specific health symptoms or as a way to prevent ill health, consistent use is important.  It took me a long time to get into the habit of this, but “habit” is definitely the key word here when it comes to the really effective use of essential oils for wellness!

Dr. David K. Hill, D.C. – Chief Medical Officer for doTERRA recommends that “routine and deliberate application of essential oils can often increase and even sustain health benefits. Routine exposure can be achieved through aromatic, topical, and internal consumption based on the individual needs and level of expertise.”

What is really important is appropriate dosing, as many scientific reviews and studies have verified this to be both efficacious and moreover, safe.

For us, what was really great about starting with the Family Physician kit was the opportunity to learn what worked for us as individuals.  Everybody has an individual tolerance to the oils and individual preferences.  It’s also better to use a wide range of oils, rather than just one or two.  However, the commonality is the need for a daily model of consist use based on your unique health and lifestyle circumstances.  For example, for my anxiety, Balance is my favourite essential oil and a constant in my daily oil regime. This oil is known to help establish a feeling of calm, peace and relaxation. It helps support your body’s physiological systems and helps bring a sense of tranquility and balance. This is my go-to oil for when I feel like a chicken running around with its head cut off — over-whelmed with no idea where to start, but more than that, it is the oil I start my day with now. I remind myself to take 30 seconds as soon as I wake up to apply a drop of Balance to each wrist and rub them together. Once it’s on my wrists, I lift them to my nose and inhale. I am instantly grounded and have a much clearer head to start my day.  There are some really fun ways to integrate essential oils into your daily routine.  For example, in the morning, I aromatically dress. This is a fancy way of saying I cover myself in essential oils after I get out of the shower. The oils I choose depends on the needs of the day, which can be energy, mental clarity, less stress, or some self-love. Learn more here!

In cases of illness, frequent use is imperative.  Essential oils metabolize just like a paracetamol does.  You can use as often as every couple of hours, but as doTERRA essential oils are highly concentrated and very potent, a small dose is all that is needed to achieve powerful benefits.

Here are Dr Hill’s 6 top tips to help you implement doTERRA essential oils into a daily model of consistency:

1. Quality

To prevent sensitivities, it is important to use only pure essential oils, such as essential oils that have the doTERRA CPTG Certified Pure Therapeutic Grade® quality standard. Using altered essential oils dramatically increases the likelihood that a sensitivity or inappropriate response will develop. Join my newsletter list to learn about the dangers of essential oils altered with man-made laboratory created scents.

2. Chemistry

The chemical structure and reactivity of some essential oil elements makes them more potent than others. Phenols and aldehydes are especially strong. Diluting oils that contain a high proportion of these types of elements or using a lower dose is an excellent way to ensure safe application.  Learn the basics of essential oils at my next workshop.  Click here to see upcoming events.

3. Variety

A unique feature of essential oils is that they share many of the same benefits. There is safety and increased benefit from variety, which is one of the foundational principles of health. Try introducing a wide variety of oils into your personal usage protocol rather than focusing on just one or two main oils.

4. Amount

A common misconception is to assume that more is always better. While this may be true in some instances, it is not true with essential oils. They are highly concentrated and very potent, so a small dose is all that is needed to achieve powerful benefits. It is best to use smaller amounts of oil and apply more frequently.

5. Dilution

There are many benefits to diluting essential oils, including slowing the rate of absorption to prevent sensitivities and increasing the surface area of absorption. I generally recommend a dilution ratio of one drop of essential oil to three drops of carrier oil. This ratio can be altered depending on the chemistry of the oil and the preferences or sensitivities of the user.

6. Personal Consideration

Certain individuals, such as young children and the elderly, require special precautions when using essential oils because their skin is typically more sensitive. Appropriate dilution modifications or essential oil substitutions should be made to cater to their individual needs.

For a free essential oil consultation to discuss your needs, click here!

Much love x x

My High Needs Baby

I’ve had some dark days with Eden recently.  She has pushed me to the limits of my patience (and sanity).  This is hard to write because I love her to bits, but I feel like I have been challenged by her since the day she was born and this week as things have been really hard again I have thought, “when is this ever going to end?”

You might have already read Eden’s Story and her journey as a baby born with major gut issues.  It took us a while to realise what was going on with Eden and see a Specialist who knew what Eden was suffering.  A long time before this I read an article by Attachment Parenting guru Dr. William Sears, which really struck a chord.  It was about the “high need baby“.  Eden ticked every box!

Dr. Sears and his wife, Martha, coined the term “high need baby” when their fourth baby, Hayden, was born. While their first 3 children had been generally easy babies, Hayden was only happy when being held or fed. It was then that they realized that some babies are just truly high need.

While I totally agree, what I have also observed through my personal journey with Eden and through meeting other mums with babies/toddlers/young children that also tick the boxes of “high need” is that there’s definitely a connection to problems in the gut.

We know there is a dynamic interaction between the gut, the brain, and the immune system, starting from birth.  For example, immune cells reside within the gut and that was one of Eden’s big issues as a baby; her immune system was really compromised!

It feels like a bad dream now thinking about what we did go through with Eden.  In the grand scheme of things she is so much better, for which I am grateful!  I didn’t realise how bad it was with her (and how abnormal her constant cries and needs were) until I had my second girl Jade.  Case in point; no milestone, change, challenge, illness has ever got her like Eden got daily!  Eden’s physical and emotional being was so fragile, still is, and while her physical needs have reduced greatly thanks to the gut healing we have done, her emotional needs are still great.  Admittedly I forget this as we go about our daily life and so fall quite regularly into overwhelm when she overreacts or she gets overwhelmed.  Thankfully essential oils come to our rescue to restore our equilibrium. I would recommend them to anyone dealing with a high needs baby/toddler/child!

So what do we use?

There are 4 essential oils that I use regularly with Eden:

doTERRA’s Console, Serenity, Balance & Peace

To read about why I chose doTERRA, click here,

Read on for the benefits of each wonderful oil!

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1.  CONSOLE

One of the primary essential oils in the doTERRA Console Blend is Ylang Ylang, which is calming and balancing for the body and mind.  It also contains Frankincense Resin, Patchouli Leaf, Labdanum Leaf/Stalk, Amyris Bark, Sandalwood Wood, Rose Flower and Osmanthus Flower which are comforting and grounding.

I use Console in those moments when we’ve all ‘lost the plot’.  The tears are flowing, the tempers have boiled over, emotions are high… I put it in the diffuser or rub it within a carrier oil into our necks.  It is instantly comforting (and you guessed it, consoling!)

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2. SERENITY

The first thing to go out of the window for Eden when she is challenged emotionally is sleep.  Serenity is a beautifully calming blend of essential oils like Lavender and Roman Chamomile.  I diffuse Serenity aromatically in the bedroom to create a calming and peaceful environment before bed, use a Serenity soap or bath melt in the bath, or massage as a balm I make myself.

Serenity is also great in those “lacking calm”moments! Just one drop to the back of the neck is instantly calming, wherever we are and whatever we’re doing!  I also apply Serenity to my brow when I need perspective on my situation with Eden in order to be more gentle with myself or seek answers about how to move forward in whatever challenge we are facing.

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3.  BALANCE

Balance has been a key oil in the Emotional Toolbox that has got me through severe anxiety problems.  It is extremely grounding and so is great to use every day to the bottoms of the feet when the high needs bubs/toddler/child is going through change or challenging emotions.  It contains Frankincense like Console, but also contains Blue Tansy, which ignites feelings of self-control, focus, and balance, and Blue Chamomile, which is quite sedative.

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4.  PEACE

Peace fuses floral and mint essential oils.  It is known as a Reassuring Blend, to promote feelings of contentment, composure, and reassurance when anxious feelings overwhelm your emotions.  I find Peace really good when Eden is anxious.  This actually happens a lot, but presents in different guises. Eden is affected by loud noises, new environments, too much stimulation or situations she lacks control in.  She presents as overwhelmed or even afraid.  Peace composes her.  I have started using Peace for my younger girl, Jade too, whose big milestones (she’s 1) are leaving her anxious when she’s away from me.

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I guess the final part of this blog is honesty around having to remind myself what I like about Eden when she does push me to the limits of my sanity.  Because maybe that might help you too.  Because maybe you’re feeling quite alone right now and utterly horrible for finding your own high need bubs/toddler/child horrible.

A beautiful friend once explained to me that what often happens with kids who are higher needs is that they have an appearance of calm, but actually aren’t.  She shared a thermometer diagram with me to explain what she meant and this has always stayed with me!  Basically, our children sit higher up the thermometer and so constantly sit at a tipping point, and this is why it takes only “little things” to tip them over:

So, one of the things I have promised myself I will do more of is project myself into her mind when we are in a situation that is escalating or at risk of triggering a chain of unwanted events… I ask myself:

  • What would she want me to say and do in this situation?
  • What can I change about the situation I am considering to ensure it meets her needs as well as mine and/or involves her?

It isn’t easy parenting these “high needs”, but it is possible to adopt more empathetic and appropriate responses.  I am still learning!

And the things I love about Eden?

She is resilient, with a warm heart, an inquiring mind and the strength of an ox.  She is independent and unique and beautiful.  I use Forgive essential oil to help myself move on from the soul destroying guilt I feel each time I lose my composure and feel overcome by her more challenging traits instead of these beautiful traits I love.

If you’d like to explore those questions above, as they relate to your situation and whatever brought you to my blog, request a free discovery call here.

If you’re curious now about the positive changes essential oils could make to your life, get my free eBook here.

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Much Love x x

5 Ways with an Essential Oil TWIST to Ignite Joy in your Life Right Now

I have to admit that today I am feeling really low. I hate admitting that! I’m a Life Coach, your Life Transformation Coach for Health & Happiness, how can I possibly allow myself to get down?!

It happens, life happens! The important thing is how we respond because the longer we stay down the harder it is to come back up!

As a mum, I don’t have a great deal time to do the things I used to do to lift my mood – the long walks in nature, a massage, a relaxing bath, a little gift to myself or a night out with friends! So the following are instant ways to spark joy AND they are kid hanging off your ankles friendly.

What do I mean by joy? That warm feeling, that sudden need to smile, that assurance that all is well in the world, even the giddy feeling of being totally carefree for a few moments.

Firstly, just quickly, what specifically makes you feel good? Focus on it. How does it make you feel? That’s your joy! Now let’s ignite that feeling when you need it!

  • OPTION 1:  MAKE ICE CREAM! You’re a mum, so I am guessing you have frozen bananas in the freezer for smoothies and the like? What if you could whip these babies up into chocolate orange happiness in under a minute? Ice cream cheers you up, right? This is classic comfort food without as much sugar and with the magical uplifting powers of wild orange essential oil. Just combine a few drops of Wild Orange essential oil (get yours here) with a handful of dark chocolate chips and your frozen bananas (preferably small chunks) and whizz away in the blender for about 45 seconds. Serve immediately. Feel the joy (and the kids will love you too 🙂 )
  • OPTION 2: BE MINDFUL. I know I must sound like a broken record in these blogs, but I cannot stress enough how important it is to just be. If you struggle with this, grab my At EASE rollerball and try again (get yours here). It helps me no end when I struggle to stay focused in a task – including contemplating the fluff in my navel! (Or not contemplating it, as that would be thinking and mindfulness is a mind without thought 😉)
  • OPTION 3: DANCE LIKE NO ONE IS WATCHING even if you’re surrounded by kids, the dog and your curtain twitching neighbour! Grab a sniff of Cheer (you can check this amazing blend out here), put on your favourite song and dance. If baby needs your arms, wrap her, if your toddler wants to play, dance with her. Dance like no one is watching until the smile comes and your worries float away
  • OPTION 4: WALK. It doesn’t matter where. Put a drop of Balance on each wrist (see why here), breathe in the grounding aromas, feel the tightness in your chest melt away and the furrows in your brows relax then hit the pavement. Again, this is one you can do with the kids. The important thing is just get out the house and breathe in the fresh air!
  • OPTION 5: THROW OUT THE TO DO LIST.  The washing will wait, you can last another day without the food shopping and the world won’t end if you don’t make it to Mainly Music. (OK, that’s a lie, your 4 year old’s world will end.) Sometimes we can get so busy it becomes overwhelming and our moods falls flat because life seems insurmountable! When this happens, stop. Grab Serenity essential oil, make the kids some playdough (and lace it with Serenity essential oil 😉 ) and just laze about.

You’re welcome 🙂

Much Love X X

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My Emotional Toolbox

The last couple of weeks have been really hard. Business has been a bit quiet after Christmas, so finances have been a little tight, my gorgeous husband has gone back to work after all of those fun family times at Christmas and my emotions have been up and down.

There has also been the additional stress of organising childcare for Eden, who is nearly 4 and totally ready for the transition, but I’m not. I also inquired about child care for Jade who is now one, so that I could increase my available times to coach and run the essential oil consultations and workshops, but ultimately I realised that is not why I set up Essential Mum!

When Eden was one, just like Jade is now, our financial stress was so much greater that I was forced to put Eden into childcare and reluctantly go back to work. Although I did love my job, I didn’t love it as much as I missed spending time with Eden and #beingmum (read my previous blog post ‘No More Moments Missed‘); I certainly didn’t go about my work with the passion and heart I do now! This time I realised I have the freedom to do things differently. And who wouldn’t want to with these two scrumptious faces?!

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However, this has required a change of mindset and a reworking of my old ways and habits.  As an anxiety sufferer my go to emotion was panic in situations where I feel overwhelmed or have to make big decisions. Instead of thinking rationally and calmly about the options open to me I would panic, get into a flap, and usually make a knee jerk decision that was not the right one!

It has taken some work on myself with the coaching and essential oils to rework those old habits and remain calm under pressure. I have a Mantra that I have started to share on Facebook:

“Remember to use your oils!”

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It is so easy when you start to feel better after using essential oils for anxious feelings and other negative emotions to forget to use them again when you have a slip. So, in the last couple of weeks I have remembered my essential oil rituals and started using them again and this has brought me back to the right emotional space to employ my new way of approaching decision making, with a clear mind and a focused goal.

So what I’m going to share with you now is exactly that emotional toolbox, so that you too can use essential oils to manage negative emotions when life challenges and to help stop you slipping back into old patterns.

Make the oils that are right for you part of your routine and habit, so they are an integral part of your life and happiness.  The five in my toolbox are just a small selection of the emotional aromatherapy available.  To fully understand the potential of using essential oils for your emotional balance, and to get started <<click here>>

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Much Love

Essential Mum x x

Achieving Hormonal Balance

Let’s face it, being mum is a crazy journey! It’s exhilarating and exhausting all at once, we have days where we feel like superwoman and we have days where we feel like Superman when he’s on kryptonite. What we don’t need as women is an unhealthy hormone balance to screw with our mood, emotions and our weight, which screws with our self-esteem, our digestion, our sleep and other key areas of our life as well!

Essential oils can be be very powerful in rebalancing our hormones. Unlike drugs you may be prescribed by a doctor, the oils do not contain hormones, but have properties that stimulate hormone production and balance. First of all, how do we recognize our hormones are out of sync?

There are a variety of symptoms that we can look out for:

  • irritability, anxiousness
  • PMS
  • menopausal symptoms that interfere with day to day life
  • heavy periods, irregular cycles
  • inability to lose weight
  • breast tenderness
  • hair loss
  • fatigue, insomnia
  • hypothyroidism
  • lack of sex drive
  • dryness “down below”
  • Sore joints and tendonitis
  • increase in belly fat.

This is just a few indications that your hormones could be out of balance.  And it can be different hormones “out of whack.”

The following oils can balance estrogen levels:

  • Clary Sage and fennel (both phytoestrogenic oils)
  • Lavender (naturally lowers cortisol levels)
  • Frankincense (balances hormone levels, which reduces symptoms associated with menstruation and menopause)
  • Basil (great for period pain and increases the body’s natural response to both physical and emotional stress, while conditioning you to cope better)
  • Geranium (an adaptogen oil ).

I use Geranium every day for its overall balancing effect on female hormones.  As I am breastfeeding I have suspected low estrogen, but I also suffer from adrenal fatigue, so this is a great oil for me. I rub it over my kidneys mixed in fractionated coconut oil and frankincense daily. Of course, stress can also cause low estrogen in all its different guises (dietary, emotional, too much work and not enough sleep, environmental toxins, or pain and inflammation) and it definitely causes adrenal fatigue over an extended period of time. So it’s really important to work on this also to avoid a state of chronic stress that causes your cortisol levels to rise, which in turn causes drops in estrogen and progesterone that can cause menstrual irregularities, weight gain, estrogen dominance, and infertility.

Out of all the essential oils listed above Clary sage is the most commonly related to hormone balance and has been used since Medieval times for balancing hormones and relieving pain.  You can dilute a few drops in fractionated coconut oil and rub into your ankles daily. Or, if menstrual cramps are painful, rub the mixture directly onto your stomach and ovary area for pain relief. Add geranium to the blend to enhance pain relief.

You can also add a few drops of clary sage and geranium to a warm bath and enjoy a soak.  Or buy my Balancing Bath Melts that use this blend.

There is a great article on the doTERRA blog about hormonal balance, which also talks about the importance of diet in hormonal balance and introduces some of the doTERRA products available for hormone health. For example, the doTERRA® Phytoestrogen Lifetime Complex contains plant-based phytoestrogens, flax seed extract, and pomegranate extract. The ClaryCalm® Monthly Blend is a specially formulated blend of 12 essential oils that can be applied to the skin for a soothing effect.

There are other things you can do to support your hormonal balance.  Dietary stress (eating the wrong foods for your body, or too many processed foods), emotional stress, too much work and not enough sleep and environmental toxins have a hugely negative effect on your hormone balance.  I refer a lot in this blog to reducing your toxic load by following a more natural way of life.  I have decided to elaborate on this and other ways to get and stay healthy in a free 30-page e-book available when you subscribe to my newsletter.  Look out for the launch of this on my Facebook page in the next few weeks!

The final thing I recommend to keep hormonal imbalances from wreaking havoc is a Liver Detox with Lemon Essential Oil.  The liver regulates the sex hormones, primarily estrogen.

A Dutch study has found that the compounds in lemon peels, a large component of doTERRA’s lemon essential oil, improve liver functions like hormone regulation by lowering liver cholesterol.  You can add 1-5 drops of lemon essential oil to a glass of 250ml water each morning and drink before you eat or drink anything else. I do this for blocks of 6-12 weeks when I feel my body needs it.

You can also buy my beautifully delicate blend of Evening Primrose Oil and doTERRA Balance, Frankincense, Geranium, Clary Sage and Lavender in a rollerball for $10.

I add Balance to the oils I recommend above because it contains Blue Chamomile, Ho Wood and Frankincense to support with stress, quiet the mind and uplift mood, but also Spruce that has a hormone mimicking action that helps reestablish balance, especially in the pituitary, thyroid, adrenal and reproductive glands. You can apply to the t-zone on your face and rub in like a moisturiser nightly, apply directly to hormonal breakouts or use on the soles of your feet/ankles daily to support hormonal balance. Contact me to order yours now.

Oils can also be ordered in these handy packs of 4 mini bottles in a beautiful purple or black carry case that you can take out and about with you for use when you need to.  $60 with your choice of 4 oils.

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Please note, what works for one person may not work for another and my experience/products should not replace advice from a doctor.

Much love x x